GREAT IS THY FAITHFULNESS: NOTES OF A STORYTELLER

#LatePost
 
Time: Before the cock crowed twice.
Location: Somewhere in Nigeria.

I finally rise, with an alarming wealth of feeling.
I had been falling in and out of sleep as different thoughts ran through my mind.
My phone had started ringing some minutes before.
Breathe. Yes, I’m actually breathing.
Okay.
Let’s go…

Today is my birthday.

And today, however, it is with a sense of gratitude I mark this year. Songs rise in my heart in gratefulness to God. Not that you care or anything, but He has been super good and faithful to me, as is His character. I have not been an exception.

A songwriter once said, “Count your blessings, name them one by one”. And I began to wonder how realistic this was. His blessings are innumerable…how could I name them all? Well, thank God for another songwriter who also said, “What the Lord has done for me, I cannot tell it all.”

One of the songs that rocked my vocal playlist this morning was “Storyteller” by Morgan Harper Nichols feat. Jamie Grace. And for the record, that song is PHENOMENAL. She sang my heart EXACTLY. You can figure what the melons she was singing here.

Your constant love reaches above the heavens; your faithfulness touches the skies. (Psalm 108:4 - GNB).

Then there was the poem I wrote (a while back) in a feeble attempt to express God’s love in verses. I thought it was only fitting:

LOVE SONG
The cadence builds in soft rhythms
Undulating melodies gently stirring
Curl round my weary stone
Crimson is she who had been battered
Torn and scraped till she bled crimson
This stone, my bleeding heart
So, the tunes continue to rise
Building into a sweet song

The first verse is a soft whisper
It’s sonority gushing over polished pews
Flowing to dark, lonely hours
Resonating in the corners of my heart
Calling in an rousingly sweet sing-song
“Come, my love!”
I sway in almost hypnotic dances
Until I find myself at your feet
Kneeling and weeping, “Here I am.”
How I love this verse!
The one where you found me [or I, You?]
Beating drums on a resonant cross
Cooing to this infantile lass
Drawing me with your piper’s tune
To that place where only you can heal
And wrap me in your arms.

The second verse is a soft voice
Breezing gently like mild wind on a summer day
Lifting my heart to planes of passion
Awakening a hunger for more of you
“Arise, my love!”
I rise, staggering as though in a stupor
Struggling to steady feeble knees
But you remind me of your love still
How I love this verse!
The one where you find me [or I, you?]
Side by side you on a resonant cross
Pleasured by your presence on a solitary hill
Romance and intimacy that intoxicates
A place where music lacks not a voice
And you call me beautiful.

The third verse is a loud call
Yet one I oft miss for it is quiet
Stirring my feet to move in rhythm to you
A bitter-sweet melody to my heart
“Go, my love!”
I hesitantly move my heavy feet
Will I leave this hill to the crowded square?
I fear for myself yet go still
How I love this verse
The one where you find me [or I, you?]
Cut with whips of pain and love
Beaten to pulp on your resonant cross
Like fluttering birds in a hedged nest
My heart struggles to break free
As your song stirs and draws me
To that place where you are sufficient
And I am enough to be used.

The chorus is a simple, unending melody
Weaving itself through every verse
Lacing intricately in soft and loud tunes
“Your banner over me is love!”
How I love this chorus
The one where you find me [or I, you?]
It spills resonantly for all to hear
This very perfect love song.

*************************************

Side Note:
I kid you not when I tell you I literally breathed a sigh of relief this morning when I thought: I AM 20 YEARS OLD. FINALLY! 

Y’all, be not deceived, 19 is such an AWKWARD age. You are legally an adult but not really an adult when people don’t hesitate to remind you that you are after all, still a teenager. That look!

I am just reaallyy grateful I finally pulled it through the teen phase and with a story too. A colourful one, if you will. This past year was actually one of my best, and chief among the numerous things God blessed me with this year was CLARITY; at least to a considerable degree. 

I have laughed. Cried. Stood. Fallen. Won. Failed. Grown. There were times of silence. There were times of sorrow and unbelievable joy. There were times of aloneness (and maybe loneliness). And there was always Love. He was ALWAYS there. This may sound trite but I literally did NOTHING to deserve Him. I did nothing but suck and generally be an idiot. He is be-awesome (beyond awesome).

Then there were the people. Those super beautiful souls, my personal angels who God deliberately surrounded me with. Y’all are awesome. Don’t give me that look; you know yourself!

And I am sooo looking forward to this new year. I am looking forward to another year to prepare for my glorious eternity. Another year to add more stars to my crown. Another year to pant to behold His face. Another year to dream.

Hope.

Cry.

Laugh.
 
Die.
 
Live.
 
Fail.
 
Win.
 
Love.
 
See.
 
Believe.
 
Grow.
 
Be.

P.S: My birthday was yesterday.

P.P.S: A big shout-out to all who made it memorable. God bless y'all.

FORGETFUL ME

Yesterday was my birthday and it’s just so amazing how time imperceptibly tip toed past my beclouded – and yes, bespectacled – eyes. Eyes that were so busy roving over history books of yesterdays, clouded by the past that they forgot to see time dancing past.
 

I am particularly big on history. I believe, for one, that if we want to move ahead in the future and not make the mistakes we did in the past, there is a need to dust up our books and take stock. That sounds like a perfectly logical thing to do. Right?

Which was why yesterday, I decided to settle down and think of my past. I thought of my childhood (*smug smile* yes, I said childhood), my teenage years (ok, don’t roll your eyes now – I meant the major parts) and my…now. From where I sat on my bed that morning, the view looked very colourful, with some white, black, red, green and even grey areas. 

At that point I got confused; what part do I focus my lens on, really? Those times when I did things I wasn’t so proud of? Or those ones where I could beat my puffed up chest? Either way the lens went, one thing was evident, there was no helping my future with this. I tried so hard to spot mistakes and think up new strategies to advance. Nada. Zilch. Nothing! I tried resolutions and wishing lists. Didn’t work. Because somewhere in my heart I couldn’t find a motivation, a springboard to hop on to my new year.

I kept searching.

And searching….

Then it hit me! 

“See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.” (Isaiah 43:19 - NIV)

I finally got it. God is doing something new! He is making ways and springing upwelling of waters. This is the trend. And He’s calling me, drawing my attention and wondering how I could be so alarmingly obtuse. “I’m doing it! Open your eyes and see it. Perceive it. Don’t be so insensitive”. There is relief for me in this arid place. There are spurts of revitalizing waters in this desert but somehow I couldn’t see it and God’s gift to me is this, “Look!”

But there is a problem.

The new is great and exciting. It is all I want and all I look forward to, old news is getting boring and frustrating. But there’s more to this promise than just looking and seeing it. To enter my brand new future, there has to be a “letting go”. I need to forget the past, no matter how ugly and frayed or how sparkly and glorious because going over history will keep me from the new, it would build a misty cloud over my eyes so I miss my “new” twirling past me.

 “No one cuts up a fine silk scarf to patch old work clothes; you want fabrics that match. And you don’t put wine in old, cracked bottles; you get strong, clean bottles for your fresh vintage wine. And no one who has ever tasted fine aged wine prefers unaged wine.” (Luke 5:36 – The Message).

So, no matter how much I fancy my old clothes, there is no patching them up with the new silk. Nope. God would not build a new skyscraper on an old foundation, he would not make do with the old. He would not build on my yesterday. I have to forget the past. Forget it and how comfortable it is, forget how cozy its familiarity feels, forget its glories and shame. Everything.

I’m dropping my thick-leather-back history tome, placing it in a fancy chariot and hurling it at a 60 degree tangent straight into the Red Sea; chariot and all.

I’m turning my back.

 

And I’m getting forgetful.

That. Is. My. Happy Birthday.

“Forget about what’s happened; don’t keep going over old history. Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new. It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it? There it is! I’m making a road through the desert, rivers in the badlands.” (Isaiah 43:19 – The Message Bible).